The Lack of Security and the Growth of Fear
Posted on | July 2, 2011 | No Comments
What’s happening to my world? I grew up playing on the street, knowing every adult was my friend and could be relied on in times of childhood trouble. My parents made little, we ate well enough and clothes got passed around from cousin to sibling and back. No, my childhood was not a lovely dream. My childhood was filled with abuse and fear, but also love and friendship.
I have started to return to those times in a way that makes sense for me. No more new cars because that’s what my self esteem demands. I won’t shop because it’s on sale. The financial crisis has taken care of that for many of us. A new understanding of psychology has given me the names and terms for conditions I could not have explained earlier. But I know one thing: before life got complicated it wasn’t always easy and yes, I felt dread from time to time. But I ‘fixed’ my problems by emotional grounding, crying to reduce anxiety and asking others for help and assurance. I relied on my connections and tried to work through problems instead of dropping people and situations that were uncomfortable. I want to go back in time.
I will connect more in meaningful ways. I will smile more and praise others more often. Passing in the sidewalk, I will acknowledge others – even if they think I’m crazy.
Shawn M.Nichols, MA, CC
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