The Put-Up and Smack-Down in One Sentence. A Power Trip.

Posted on | June 6, 2014 | No Comments

The Put-Up and Smack-Down in One Sentence. A Power Trip. Have you ever heard something like this? I’m so surprised and happy about your (fill in success moment). I love they way you’re doing your (hair, clothes, golf game) now! How is your little business venture doing these days? I worry about you because I never hear from you. You turned out well. Many people use these expressions of alleged admiration and concern in order to put people back in the place the speaker intends them to be – somewhere lower and less than the speaker. If you ask the speaker about this they will deny (often honestly) that that was certainly not their intention. “Honey, how can you say that? I love you!” Implication: they have the best intentions for you but you are too (dull, weak, sensitive, ignorant) to know that. It’s a power trip. Make no mistake. The only reasonably loving but lopsided reason I have ever heard for this type of statement is that while the speaker wants to acknowledge your success, they are afraid to burden you with the Eternal Mantle of Success. In other words, you’ll fail again (remember your last binge, sweetie-poo) but right now the speaker wants to validate your success because that makes the speaker a better person. And shows you that they are loving and attentive while praising how big you’ve grown! Oh and in case you haven’t seen this: be mindful of people who say aggressive, hurtful things while addressing you by your nickname, which is also a bit demeaning. Beware; you may be using these statements yourself. Ask around if anyone is still speaking to you. Shawn M. Nichols

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• Dealing with Death’s Vortex
• Assessing Your World View- The Sand Castle
• Enlightenment and Addiction on the Internet: Neural Receptors Ramp Up
• The Perversity of Education
• Saul Bellow’s notion, “Warehouse of Good Intentions”.
• I Walk In Two Worlds But Neither Is Home.
• Talking to yourself? It’s called a soliloquy..
• The Put-Up and Smack-Down in One Sentence. A Power Trip.
• Elegy for Future Gun Victims – We are so sorry.
• Bam Bam Style Leadership and Management

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