Shawn Nichols, MA, CC.

shawnnichols.com

We ignore the warnings and we avoid the confrontation, knowing all the time, it will just get worse. We isolate.

 Alone in the Wilderness 

 Video, Courtesy of Youtube.com

As our financial situation or our relationships worsen, we cling to old ideas and negative people because the devil we know is better than the one we don’t. We think. We run away.

Image Courtesy of Google Images

In workshops, I ask my clients to become the big brother or sister to themselves. It takes a bit of visual imagery, a lot of practiced thinking but who better to care for ourselves than US!

We tell ourselves it will get done eventually, some time, maybe later, when? I’ve taken many courses in dealing with stress and procrastination. The course that was missing? The one course I REALLY needed?

How to try or do something, possibly screw it up, forgive myself and move on!

I discovered, that I didn’t always screw up, sometimes the effort was better than if I agonized about it, wanted it perfect, waited for the prefect moment, etc. I’ve done more work, accomplished and created more in that half hour before I had to leave the house for some unrelated appointment.

Yeah! That’s right. I had to just GET IT DONE! But wait, until you need to leave the house, the office or the studio. In those last few minutes, you may even finish a task you thought so large it would never get done.

Another thing. A list works well for some people but for some of us, we begin to AVOID the list or the desk.

I’m meeting some friends for dinner now, but I just wrote the outline for a new presentation. It was something I had put off for too long. Now, it’s done.

Shawn M. Nichols

Later, I'll do it later.

What’s happening to my world? I grew up playing on the street, knowing every adult was my friend and could be relied on in times of childhood trouble. My parents made little, we ate well enough and clothes got passed around from cousin to sibling and back. No, my childhood was not a lovely dream. My childhood was filled with abuse and fear, but also love and friendship.

I have started to return to those times in a way that makes sense for me. No more new cars because that’s what my self esteem demands. I won’t shop because it’s on sale. The financial crisis has taken care of that for many of us. A new understanding of psychology has given me the names and terms for conditions I could not have explained earlier. But I know one thing: before life got complicated it wasn’t always easy and yes, I felt dread from time to time. But I ‘fixed’ my problems by emotional grounding, crying to reduce anxiety and asking others for help and assurance. I relied on my connections and tried to work through problems instead of dropping people and situations that were uncomfortable. I want to go back in time.

I will connect more in meaningful ways. I will smile more and praise others more often. Passing in the sidewalk, I will acknowledge others – even if they think I’m crazy.

Shawn M.Nichols, CC

big feet, simple joys

If you have been reading here for a while, you know I tout great resources and books that I find. Some of those reviews appear on my other site www.ShawnNichols.com.

Someone I just met has been making major waves in others’ lives. In a very positive way. Natasha Zaslove at www.nzaslove.com is an Astrologer with a great sense of Intuition and Understanding. A former high-powered attorney (surprise!), she isn’t a fuzzy tambourine banging desert nymph moaning to herself. Her approach is direct and supportive. She lives and heals among the bold scenery of Sedona, Arizona.

I was introduced to her about two weeks ago. She did my chart, showed it to me for about ten minutes while she explained it, and then talked to me for the next three hours as though she had known me all my life. I know, we have all seen or heard about this before. But she was able to place important events, desires, and obstacles in a real perspective. In terms of my future, yes, not all is rosy. What Natasha did for me was discuss and explore my career, education and dreams in a responsible, strategic and do-able light.

She is on my list of must talk to OFTEN.